I avoid someone because I wronged them
On the distance that guilt builds, and why it grows the longer it is left.
مَن كانَت له مَظلِمةٌ لأخيه مِن عِرضِه أو شيءٍ فليَتَحَلَّلْه منه اليَومَ، قَبلَ أن لا يَكونَ دينارٌ ولا دِرهَمٌ، إن كان له عَمَلٌ صالِحٌ أُخِذَ منه بقدرِ مَظلِمَتِه، وإن لَم تَكُنْ له حَسَناتٌ أُخِذَ مِن سَيِّئاتِ صاحِبِه فحُمِلَ عليه
“Whoever has wronged his brother in his honour or in anything, let him seek his pardon today, before there is neither dinar nor dirham: if he has righteous deeds, they will be taken from him in the measure of his wrong, and if he has no good deeds, some of his companion's misdeeds will be taken and laid upon him.”Translated by Uswah draft, awaiting review
Sahih al-Bukhari 2449
Narrator : Abu HurayraGraded by : al-BukhariSource :
Avoidance reads as indifference from the other side. What you experience as shame, they experience as being dropped, and the gap between those two readings widens every week.
What to doSend four sentences: what you did, that it was yours, no reason, and one question.
Next
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On the difference between forgiving someone and trusting them with the same thing again.
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What to do when the asking never stops, and what the Prophet ﷺ told a man who came to him for help.